Features
Songs Christopher Walken Taught Us
(And the Manner in Which He Did So)
The enigmatic actor takes a break from playing the same role
to spread some good will through the gift of music
In the Wilderness
We are gathered in the center of our campsite, conversing and supping on beans around a blazing fire.
Deftly, he emerges from the shadows, brandishing an unvarnished acoustic guitar.
We are, naturally, taken aback by his wholly unanticipated appearance onto the scene. We are silent, but incredulous looks are exchanged, glances that ask: Could it really be...? And why here? And at this unlikely hour?
But the situation is so improbable and he nods so genially in greeting that we are quickly set at ease. Or perhaps it is his incongruous manner of dress that disarms us: the red paisley-print bandana headband, the button-down denim shirt, the bolo tie, the faded jeans, the enormous belt buckle in the shape of an eagle, replete with fake turquoise insets.
Cautiously, he strums the guitar, misfingering the first chord, and rolls his eyes in a gesture of apology. He begins to croon in a haunting falsetto in what sounds like a foreign language...possibly Gaelic, although it could be entirely of his own invention. The lyrics are roughly as follows, though the exact words are difficult to transcribe:
Too-loo-a-lie
Roo-koo-koo-a-rye-lee
Lee-ka-lee-tum-too-ree
Too-loo-a-lie-lee
The song continues in this fashion for several verses.
When he strums the final chord, we applaud with restraint but great sincerity, genuinely moved by the extemporaneous performance. We rise to thank him, but already he has retreated into the darkness.
Later, after we have retired to our tents, bouts of soft singing waft about the campsite...
Too-lie-a-loo...
Koo-koo-lee-too-lie-too-rye...
Intermittent, erroneous verses arise throughout the night until everyone has fallen asleep.
– Todd Monkeypants
Posted by Übermidget Staff on 11/13 • (0) Comments • Permalink
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